Wow! This was an eye opener. What I discovered was that there are several areas that I need to work on. The first major one was family. I do okay with my own family (as in my husband, kids, and grandkids). What I need the most is to work on my relationships with my mother and my brother. This is an area where I have not handled things very well. I become very frustrated with my mother alot. She is and has always been a very negative person. Many times I have chosen not to deal with it by just shutting her out. I don't answer the phone when she calls or I avoid her all together. I really need to work on this. She is who she is and since this has been her personality forever, she is not likely to change. The change therefore needs to come from me. I think I need to focus on the very few positives that are in the relationship. She is supportive of me and my career and my life. She doesn't know or chooses not to voice her feelings. Just when I think I can't take it anymore, she sends me a card telling me how important I am to her and that I am her rock in life. Wow! I'll work on this by trying to be more patient of her.
As for my brother, I'm not sure this is a situation that will ever change. It also is not one that worries me or bothers me that we do not speak. He has been the source of much heartache in my life over the years. I have forgiven him for much of what he has done, but have also chosen not to be around him until he changes his ways. He is to put it bluntly, lazy (no job for 6 years), vulgar (language that would embarrass a sailor), a con artist (scams money or things from anyone or any place he can), and very disrespectful to my mother (he curses her out and calls her very bad things.) He also abused his four month old daughter by shaking her and putting her in the hospital for months. This is one of the things I have trouble with the most. At this point, all I can do to repair this relationship is to pray for his soul. He needs to find the Lord.
Some positive things that have come from this assessment are I have gone very far in improving my nutrition and fitness. I have lost nearly 100 pounds since February (thanks to gastric bypass surgery). I feel so much better and I have started walking. That is something I never have been able to do. I make it my routine now to walk at least 2 miles a day and I am increasing that each day. That makes me feel good! My family is proud of me for my accomplishments thus far.
My priorities right now are in improving my own health and developing my own inner peace. I will resolve the other issues in time. Some of those areas are not yet ready for growth and development. Each new experience or issue will be looked back on and I'll re-assess how I handled it at the time. Progress is happening one step at a time. Thanks for letting me share.
Just Me
Monday, June 25, 2012
Monday, June 18, 2012
The Sublte Mind
I have to admit I got frustrated with this one. Try as I might, I just cannot get rid of all of the thoughts that are floating around in my mind. It was much easier for me to do the loving-kindness exercise. I have no trouble thinking of others or even myself and focusing on the loving-kindness. But it is just so frustrating to try and clear my mind when there is so much in there to think about. I like the ebb and flow of the water and I can't help but picture myself lying on the beach. I don't think my frame of mind was right when I started on this. I wasn't in a very good mood and I had too many things that were frustrating me in the beginning that I just couldn't get rid of.
My husband left for work this morning in a bad mood after we had a disagreement the night before. I couldn't think of anything else but that disagreement. I hate having a day where we didn't speak before he left to go to work. I always think of all of the "what ifs" during the day that follows. Maybe I'm just not an inner focused kind of person.
I think it would be awesome to be able to be in this place and be able to clear the mind, but it is just not something that I have learned to do yet. I think that to do this you must be practiced in it for years prior to completely being able to be absorbed in it. I guess that is why it is so frustrating for me. Anyway, it didn't take me long to become bored and unfocused with this one.
My husband left for work this morning in a bad mood after we had a disagreement the night before. I couldn't think of anything else but that disagreement. I hate having a day where we didn't speak before he left to go to work. I always think of all of the "what ifs" during the day that follows. Maybe I'm just not an inner focused kind of person.
I think it would be awesome to be able to be in this place and be able to clear the mind, but it is just not something that I have learned to do yet. I think that to do this you must be practiced in it for years prior to completely being able to be absorbed in it. I guess that is why it is so frustrating for me. Anyway, it didn't take me long to become bored and unfocused with this one.
Friday, June 8, 2012
Loving Kindness
I just love these exercises. I find them to be very relaxing and tranquil. I really have to shut myself up in a room away from all distractions to complete them. I do believe this was beneficial but I am still learning how to totally focus all of my energy and thoughts when doing these exercises. It's still somewhat difficult for me to clear my mind and be able to picture what is asked of me. I had no problem with first part of focusing on a loved one. I did find it a little difficult to try to focus on a family member who is suffering because frankly, I couldn't bring anyone to mind. I like to believe that I always put other's feelings before mine. I will go out of my way to make someone happy or do something special for them for no particular reason. I think I get that from my father because I've never met anyone who didn't immediately love him when they met him. I would give anything to have just one more minute with him again. Practicing loving kindness on strangers is not so difficult for me because I wish the best for everyone. The thing I find difficult is to have loving kindness for those people who have hurt me badly over the years. My strong faith is the only thing that allows me to do this to a degree. I have forgiven those people and I pray each day that they would find peace and comfort for themselves in the arms of the Lord. I always try and be a witness to what God can do in your life and live my life the way that the Lord wants me to. Ultimately, it's all for Him.
I think that there are those to who I would recommend completing this exercise. I have always believed that the people who do not give loving kindness are those who do not love themselves either. I believe that in order to give loving kindness, you must first learn to love yourself. I sometimes think how lonely these people must be and how miserable they must be in their lives. All I can do is to show kindness to them and pray for them, and to make myself an example to others.
The concept of a mental workout is first to focus on your body and its sensations, both the pleasant and unpleasant feelings. By doing so you can give them your love, kindness, and a sense of ease, spaciousness, and care. I often use this technique to relax tense muscles or just to decrease any pain I may be having. When you focus on it, you can ease it as well. Sort of like having a baby and trying to deal with the pain by breathing and riding through the rough contractions until you can once again relax. Once you have given all of the unpleasant feelings love and equal care, you must turn your attention to your inner mind. Focus on the stillness, peace, and gentleness that is your natural home. This concept can not be accomplished all at once. It is something you must learn over time, practicing it for a few moments each day and working up from there. I find that is is actually exhausting at first but one you keep doing it, you can then find it as a very relaxing and pleasant experience. The proven benefits of this are that with continued practice, our initial faith will turn into confidence and then to certainty. It does require practice but just like any workout, whether physical or mental, you will see the benefits over time. It will become easier the more you practice.
Fostering your own psychological health begins with being in touch with your inner self. If you do this type of exercise each day, you will be much more balanced. I find that in times of great stress or when encountering a difficult person, it is best to take five minutes at that exact moment and practice loving kindness. Letting the feelings of anger, intolerance, and pride fester can destroy your own inner peace. It can be destructive your your mental and psychological health. It allows us to let self centeredness dissolve and to embrace others.
I think that there are those to who I would recommend completing this exercise. I have always believed that the people who do not give loving kindness are those who do not love themselves either. I believe that in order to give loving kindness, you must first learn to love yourself. I sometimes think how lonely these people must be and how miserable they must be in their lives. All I can do is to show kindness to them and pray for them, and to make myself an example to others.
The concept of a mental workout is first to focus on your body and its sensations, both the pleasant and unpleasant feelings. By doing so you can give them your love, kindness, and a sense of ease, spaciousness, and care. I often use this technique to relax tense muscles or just to decrease any pain I may be having. When you focus on it, you can ease it as well. Sort of like having a baby and trying to deal with the pain by breathing and riding through the rough contractions until you can once again relax. Once you have given all of the unpleasant feelings love and equal care, you must turn your attention to your inner mind. Focus on the stillness, peace, and gentleness that is your natural home. This concept can not be accomplished all at once. It is something you must learn over time, practicing it for a few moments each day and working up from there. I find that is is actually exhausting at first but one you keep doing it, you can then find it as a very relaxing and pleasant experience. The proven benefits of this are that with continued practice, our initial faith will turn into confidence and then to certainty. It does require practice but just like any workout, whether physical or mental, you will see the benefits over time. It will become easier the more you practice.
Fostering your own psychological health begins with being in touch with your inner self. If you do this type of exercise each day, you will be much more balanced. I find that in times of great stress or when encountering a difficult person, it is best to take five minutes at that exact moment and practice loving kindness. Letting the feelings of anger, intolerance, and pride fester can destroy your own inner peace. It can be destructive your your mental and psychological health. It allows us to let self centeredness dissolve and to embrace others.
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
Unit 3 - The Crime of the Century
June 5, 2012
Rating:
A - Physical well-being - 7: I must admit that my physical well-being is 100% better than it was a year ago at this time. That is due in part to my decision to have gastric bypass surgery in February of this year (Valentines Day)! I am almost 4 months post surgery and to date, I have lost 87 pounds. I feel so much better already and I am in better health than I have been in for a very long time. One exciting part of that is that I am no longer dependent on insulin. Since my surgery and weight loss, I have been taken off of almost all medications. I look in the mirror each day and can see a very different person looking back at me. It has been an exciting journey thus far and I am looking forward to meeting my weight loss goals.
B - Spiritual well-being - 9: I consider myself to be a very spiritual person. I have the Lord in my life and He has shown me that through Him, all things are possible. Following a very serious and devastating illness 4 years ago when I spent 21 days on a ventilator keeping me alive, I have made some significant changes in my spiritual life. When I woke after that ordeal, I immediately asked the Lord into my heart and accepted Christ as my savior. I have not missed one single Sunday in church since the day I was able to walk and drive again. I gave my testimony to my church family and my family and was baptised in front of the congregation. This was what deepened my faith. I continue each day to ask the Lord for forgiveness and to guide me through my life. I will admit, I was afraid of dying. I was not confident where I would end up after death. I am no longer afraid to die for now I know that I will enter into the Lord's kingdom and sit by his side.
C - Psychological well-being - 5: This is one aspect of my life that needs work. Although I am feeling much better about my health and my emotional and mental well-being, I still have some work to be done in this area of my life. There are people who I need to remove from my life because they are negative and do not belong in my life anymore. I have not spoken to my brother for almost a year, but I can not let his negative attitude and his undignified way of life affect me anymore. I will continue to surround myself with positive people and try and project a positive outlook for others to see. I am feeling better about myself and will continue to nurture and grow in this aspect of my life.
Moving towards my goals:
Physical well-being - I will continue to meet my weight loss goals by eating right and by increasing my exercise each day. The more weight I loose, the easier this is becoming.
Spiritual well-being - I will continue to put my faith and trust in the Lord. I will surround myself with my church family and the people who I love and the people who I know love me. I will continue to take all my problems to the Lord and trust that He will show me the way.
Psychological well-being - Set a goal each day of making a difference in someone else's life. This can be accomplished by just letting someone know that I care, making someone's day brighter by acknowledging that they are important to me. I will try and reflect that same positive attitude to all who are around me each day. I will try to lead by example.
The Crime of the Century:
I'm still trying to figure out the significance of this title. Is there a hidden meaning that I am not getting? I did enjoy this exercise and felt it was beneficial to me. It was difficult at first to visualize the areas and colors that were emmiting from them, but as I got more into it and more relaxed it became easier. I must admit that when I got to the heart area and was supposed to think and send someone who I cared about good wishes, I cried. But I am a crier anyway so it doesn't take much. I really enjoyed this one and I am looking forward to the next one. I did feel a sense of peace after doing it. Only problem I have right now is I have to come back to the same reality when I am finished. I am curious if there will be a time when I can remain in this sense of peace at all times. Also looking forward to trying this when I am feeling especially stressed throughout the day. If only I can find a quiet place in which to do it.
Rating:
A - Physical well-being - 7: I must admit that my physical well-being is 100% better than it was a year ago at this time. That is due in part to my decision to have gastric bypass surgery in February of this year (Valentines Day)! I am almost 4 months post surgery and to date, I have lost 87 pounds. I feel so much better already and I am in better health than I have been in for a very long time. One exciting part of that is that I am no longer dependent on insulin. Since my surgery and weight loss, I have been taken off of almost all medications. I look in the mirror each day and can see a very different person looking back at me. It has been an exciting journey thus far and I am looking forward to meeting my weight loss goals.
B - Spiritual well-being - 9: I consider myself to be a very spiritual person. I have the Lord in my life and He has shown me that through Him, all things are possible. Following a very serious and devastating illness 4 years ago when I spent 21 days on a ventilator keeping me alive, I have made some significant changes in my spiritual life. When I woke after that ordeal, I immediately asked the Lord into my heart and accepted Christ as my savior. I have not missed one single Sunday in church since the day I was able to walk and drive again. I gave my testimony to my church family and my family and was baptised in front of the congregation. This was what deepened my faith. I continue each day to ask the Lord for forgiveness and to guide me through my life. I will admit, I was afraid of dying. I was not confident where I would end up after death. I am no longer afraid to die for now I know that I will enter into the Lord's kingdom and sit by his side.
C - Psychological well-being - 5: This is one aspect of my life that needs work. Although I am feeling much better about my health and my emotional and mental well-being, I still have some work to be done in this area of my life. There are people who I need to remove from my life because they are negative and do not belong in my life anymore. I have not spoken to my brother for almost a year, but I can not let his negative attitude and his undignified way of life affect me anymore. I will continue to surround myself with positive people and try and project a positive outlook for others to see. I am feeling better about myself and will continue to nurture and grow in this aspect of my life.
Moving towards my goals:
Physical well-being - I will continue to meet my weight loss goals by eating right and by increasing my exercise each day. The more weight I loose, the easier this is becoming.
Spiritual well-being - I will continue to put my faith and trust in the Lord. I will surround myself with my church family and the people who I love and the people who I know love me. I will continue to take all my problems to the Lord and trust that He will show me the way.
Psychological well-being - Set a goal each day of making a difference in someone else's life. This can be accomplished by just letting someone know that I care, making someone's day brighter by acknowledging that they are important to me. I will try and reflect that same positive attitude to all who are around me each day. I will try to lead by example.
The Crime of the Century:
I'm still trying to figure out the significance of this title. Is there a hidden meaning that I am not getting? I did enjoy this exercise and felt it was beneficial to me. It was difficult at first to visualize the areas and colors that were emmiting from them, but as I got more into it and more relaxed it became easier. I must admit that when I got to the heart area and was supposed to think and send someone who I cared about good wishes, I cried. But I am a crier anyway so it doesn't take much. I really enjoyed this one and I am looking forward to the next one. I did feel a sense of peace after doing it. Only problem I have right now is I have to come back to the same reality when I am finished. I am curious if there will be a time when I can remain in this sense of peace at all times. Also looking forward to trying this when I am feeling especially stressed throughout the day. If only I can find a quiet place in which to do it.
Welcome and Journey On relaxation exercise
June 5, 2012
Hello and welcome to my blog. I hope that I can interact with you in a way that complements your journey through this course. I am looking forward to reading the blogs of others as well during this course. I was amazed at the results of completing the Journey On relaxation tape. It was not what I expected to hear, although it was very pleasant. I really did feel that I moved the blood from my core to my arms and hands. My arms felt heavy and my hands felt warm and sort of tinglely. The deep breathing helped me to relax in a way that I had not experienced before. I was fully aware of my arms and hands and I could totally tune out everything else. I am looking forward to learning how to do this with other parts of my body as well. It did seem like it took some time to return the blood to my abdomen and I continued to feel the tingling in my hands for a while afterwards. I really enjoyed this.
Hello and welcome to my blog. I hope that I can interact with you in a way that complements your journey through this course. I am looking forward to reading the blogs of others as well during this course. I was amazed at the results of completing the Journey On relaxation tape. It was not what I expected to hear, although it was very pleasant. I really did feel that I moved the blood from my core to my arms and hands. My arms felt heavy and my hands felt warm and sort of tinglely. The deep breathing helped me to relax in a way that I had not experienced before. I was fully aware of my arms and hands and I could totally tune out everything else. I am looking forward to learning how to do this with other parts of my body as well. It did seem like it took some time to return the blood to my abdomen and I continued to feel the tingling in my hands for a while afterwards. I really enjoyed this.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)